My Dual-Purpose Welcome Mat

The other day I received a package. I was not at home when it was delivered, but luckily the thoughtful (and clever) delivery man hid it, successfully eluding any would-be thiefs.

Here I go again...

(My friend asked me a question in a comment she left on one of my recent posts. My answer was too long for the comments section, so I wrote this post instead).

Two years ago (almost exactly) I wrote on my blog about how I can't stand the "Mommy Wars" between stay-at-home moms and working moms. How I think both sides need to stop being so judgemental about the other, etc, etc. It was written long before I became a working mother myself. Now that I have been on both sides, I feel even more strongly that we all just need to realize that the grand majority of mothers - working or not - are truly doing the very best they can and want nothing but the best for their children.

I have been priveleged to know many fabulous mothers in my life. My own mother, my sister, my sister-in-laws, my friends, my co-workers. I know for myself that I try to be the best mom I can possibly be to my two little boys. I love them so much it's almost absurd and everything I do and every decision I make is done with their best interests in my mind and heart. This was no more true when I was a stay-at-home mom than it is now, as a mother who works full-time. My children are healthy and happy and loved and well-cared for. This was no more true when I was a stay-at-home mom than it is now. I work very hard and I believe I have a lot to contribute. This was true then, and it's true now. And while I know I can only actually speak for myself, my observations of both the SAHMs and the working moms in my life have been very similar.

I think it's easy to pass judgement on those who make choices different than our own. But life is hard and we are all feeling our way. And we can make choices that we feel are right without thinking less of those who choose differently.

All in all, I think women need to be nicer to each other.

(Having said all this, I wonder how much of this "mommy war" crap is fueled by the media. In my personal experience, this is not really an issue I've dealt with in real life, on an individual level. The SAHMs I know don't sit around bashing working mothers, nor do the working mothers I know sit around disrespecting SAHMs. I guess we're all too busy living our lives and being good moms.)

You can read my original post here:

The Feminine Mistake

You know what makes me happy?

Spring Break traffic! It’s fabulous! I sailed to work in 23 minutes today.

That sure beats the HOUR AND FORTY FIVE minutes it took me to get home from work last Thursday. Thanks a lot, overturned oil truck. The traffic report that day was literally, and I am quoting the traffic man on 96.5, “Good luck with that.”

Oh, also, here is what I learned from the elevator TV this morning. Apparently, a good March Madness snack substitute for chips is a bag of beans. Seriously, that was the suggestion. Can’t you just see a group of guys cheering on their teams and then reaching for a handful of BEANS to munch on?

Yum.

On a much less soap-boxy note...

This weekend the boys and I went to the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo (just can't get enough Texas this week apparently!). It comes around once a year for about a month and it's a really big deal here. This is actually my first year going. Technically, we just went to the livestock show and the carnival on the grounds outside the rodeo. Maybe next year I'll add the actual rodeo to the fun.

First up we went to the livestock show. We saw newborn chicks and calves and piglets and lambs (one that had been born that morning - so cute). We also went to the petting zoo area, which was definitely a gesture of mommy love because I am not the biggest fan of those things (they gross me out, especially since Noah gets all excited about feeding the animals but then wants me to do it first; eww). Sam decided to sit it out with my girlfriend; I was jealous.

Here are some pictures of Noah and my friend's son with the animals:






Next up was the mechanical bull-riding! Noah was a total champ and had so much fun (Sam decided to sit this one out too):


We spent the rest of the day eating lots of delicious fried food. I think Houston's dubious award of Fattest City in America is a direct result of the Rodeo. I had fried zucchini with ranch, fried banana, fried oreos and fried Snickers (Oh. My. YUM).

We did take some time out from our fried feasting to play lots of games and ride lots of rides:




This was our last ride of the day (the kid's roller coaster which was actually very fun for me too!). Sam was such a sweetheart; he cuddled up to me on the ride and laughed up a storm and then about half way through he turned to me and said, "Mommy, this one scares me!"

I will leave you with a video of Noah on the mechanical bull. Nevermind the crazy "Yee-Haw!" lady in the background (that would be me).

I Definitely Am, It Turns Out

I am posting the following with the understanding that this is the type of topic that is inherently fraught with emotion and prone to misunderstanding. Because of all that, it is difficult to really tackle in a blog post. With that said...

There is a wonderful discussion going on over on this blog (which is a public, “professional” blog so I feel fine linking to it). This is a subject about which I feel very passionately, so I have read each and every one of the 500+ comments on this post. For the most part, the discussion has been very respectful and most of the posters on both sides have been thoughtful and articulate (minus a few quackadoodles and those who equate a differing opinion with a vicious attack).

Here was my main contribution to the conversation (I think I was commenter #412):

“You know how it is really frustrating when people base their opinion of an entire group of people on what a few people in that group say/think? That is how I feel right now with people rejecting feminism because of the relatively few feminists who hate men, or called SAHMs parasites, or consider men unnecessary.Just because a feminist or some feminists felt or feel that way or said that offensive thing does not mean that that is what feminism is about and it does not reduce "feminism" to an ugly thing.

Feminism is wanting equal rights for women. I am really baffled as to why any person would want to reject such a beautiful and important thing.

I feel like many of the commenters are truly missing the point on what feminism actually is. I also think it's scary when people get complacent and feel the fight is over just because now women make ‘pretty much’ what men make. Complacency is dangerous. Our foremothers didn't fight and go through everything they went through (including torture... literal, physical torture) just for us to get complacent.

One last thought to the people who don't like the term "feminism" because they prefer "humanism." I agree with you in theory, but there is an excellent reason it's called feminism; men haven't had to fight this fight (at least not for themselves - God bless the ones who fought for women). Their rights have been automatic and assumed. THAT is why it's called feminism and I embrace the term, even if I don't agree with every single thing that every single feminist has ever said.”

Originally, I had this paragraph in there as well:

“I am grateful that so many commenters before me have been so eloquent and well-spoken because honestly, the only coherent thought I had immediately upon reading this post was, ‘Are you freaking kidding me?’”

I took this out because it was kind of rude and I didn’t want my point to be lost in emotion, but this is my blog now and I can write whatever I want and be emotional if I feel like it so… Are you freaking kidding me?

There was so much more that I would have said were it not for the fact that so many fabulous commenters already beat me to it. And it’s not that I disagree with ALL of what the original poster was saying. Of course men and women aren’t the same. I, too, celebrate those differences. But for heaven’s sake, so do the grand majority of feminists! The feminist movement is about striving toward equal rights and opportunities and choices and respect and VALUE. And to quote one of the other commenters who was quoting someone else, I look forward to the day when this is no longer an issue. But unfortunately, we aren’t there yet, and the mere fact that there is so much confusion regarding the movement in the first place is a testament to that. To reduce and then dismiss feminism because of the terrible misconception that it is all about wanting to turn women into men or trying to eradicate any and all differences between the sexes is, in my opinion, so completely absurd and unfounded it just makes me want to cry. Or burn my bra.

(Just kidding – I love my bra and would never do anything to hurt it; it’s the only reason I look like I have boobs. And I quite like pretending I have boobs. Not quite as much as I would like to actually HAVE boobs, but I digress…)

This is Why They Called it the Wild, Wild West

Yesterday Noah had a kindergarten rodeo at his elementary school. It was so fun and the kids were adorable (naturally). First up was the parade through the halls with their homemade horses:


Next I admired the rodeo decor:

Then we all headed outside for the fun and games. There was the bean-bag toss through the windows of the Alamo, and then the kids got their horses ready for some racing:

But then this happened:

Poor boys!! I felt so terrible because I think the video clearly shows that it was my side-line shout-out that distracted Noah and caused him to run off course. Talk about Mommy guilt! Fortunately, neither of the boys was seriously hurt. I took them both to the office to get some ice and they were totally fine after a couple of minutes. Which is a good thing because we still had the bandana races (which were free from any cowboy collisions) and the chili cookoff left.

Me and my little buckaroo:

Plea for McDonald's Toys

Okay, my kids LOVED those Alvin and the Chipmunks McDonald's toys but the promotion ended before we were able to collect them all. Now I am begged on a daily basis to go to McDonald's so we can get a happy meal with Theodore and no amount of explanation seems to convince my children that those toys are gone.

I am embarassed to admit that I went so far as to buy a crappy McDonald's Theodore off eBay AND I emailed McDonald's corporate offices trying to track down franchises that still have them (I'm not kidding) but I refuse to compromise my dignity that way any further.

ANYWAY, I am still missing one Alvin and one Theodore. Does anyone have them? If you do, and if your kids aren't obsessed with them the way mine are and you were just going to throw them away like I normally do with happy meal toys instead of going on a scavenger hunt for them like a crazy person, can I have them?